New Beginnings

What it Means to be Capable PLUS 3 Steps to Recognizing Your Self-Worth

In last week’s blog post I discussed the importance of recognizing your self-worth.

Humans have infinite worth

I mentioned that, as a human being, you are completely capable of developing yourself so that you can give meaning to your worth.

So my question for you today is: Do you know what it means to be capable?

Let’s start with ruling-out what you probably think capable means, and that is “the skill or power to do something”.

INCORRECT. That is actually the definition of the word able. On the otherhand, the word capable takes able to a whole new level. The word capable means to have the mental capacity or know-how to do things in the best way possible.

So as a human being, you may have certain physical characteristics and skills which help you reach your goals, but most importantly you have the brain power to strategize and figure out different ways to reach your goals.

Take the story of Nick Scott as a great example:

Nick Scott was a football player in high school. During high school, he got in a horrible car accident which ended his football career and put him in a wheelchair for life.

Even though Scott couldn’t walk, run, or play football, he still had the ability to bench press at the gym. So he capitalized on that ability and committed himself to benching more weight than anyone else in his high school. Nick Scott began to recognize he was still capable of creating a good life for himself even though his accident left him with a physical disability.

Scott’s weightlifting hobby soon turned into more than that — he decided to compete in a body building competition. After finding a new passion and talent, Scott fought to have a wheelchair bodybuilding competition established under the IFBB (International Ferderation of Bodybuilding and Fitness) so that him and others could compete professionally. He began winning shows and bodybuilding.com eventually signed him as one of their athletes.

Nick Scott wheelchair bodybuilder

Scott is now, a motivational speaker and a personal trainer for other men and women in wheelchairs who want to learn bodybuilding.

The moral…

Even though Scott wasn’t physically able to play football or use all the equipment in the gym, he used his mental capacity to figure out HOW he could become a winner in the body building world.

Nick Scott might have injured himself physically but he still recognized his infinite human worth – after he was injured, he exercised his CAPABILITIES to reach a new goal in the best way he could.

Just like Nick Scott, YOU are capable of reaching your goals. You are capable of strategizing and learning and developing yourself so that you too can be successful.

So if you don’t know how to access your capabilities try following these steps:

1) Make a list of your goals, both short term and long term, career related or personal.

List of goals to achieve

2) Write why you are or are not able of achieving each goal. Be realistic in your assessment.

Why am I able to achieve my goals?

3) Write down why you are capable of improving your abilities to meet your goals.

Why am I capable of achieving my goals?

Final Step: Realize that you just created new pathways of success for yourself.

New path to success created using my capabilities

In the words of Nick Scott, it’s not about your glass being half empty or half full, it’s about being grateful that you have a glass at all.

There are so many paths that can lead you to a single goal, so remember that if one path becomes impossible to go down, you can take another. Also remember that you can dig out a new and completely unique path for yourself. And even cooler than that, you can take a path that leads toward a different goal, one that you haven’t tried to reach before. You can do all this because you are a human and you are not meant to do just ONE thing in your life.

You are meant to THINK, DEVELOP, and ADAPT. You are meant to work hard and exercise your capabilities to give your worth some meaning.

And most importantly, you can do all those things and make the next 365 days the #YearOfYou.

As always, Happy Monday ❤✌

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*Disclaimer: I am not a medical or mental health professional. Any information and content on my website is not a substitute for professional, medical, or legal advice.

Selfcare Tips

How to Finally Feel Comfortable in Your Own Skin (Learn to Be Yourself in 3 Steps)

Be comfortable in your own skin

Socialization has a funny way of eating away your self-confidence.

… Don’t you agree?

Think about it, you were born a happy little baby, but as soon as you were exposed to society – whether that was through school, social media, or recreational activities – the self-judgment began.

“I want those new Jordans because they are the fly-est shoe.”
“I want a thinner waist so I can look hot on the gram.”
“I need bigger lips to make me feel pretty.”
“I need to do squats everyday so my ass can look bomb.”

Stop. You don’t need to punish yourself like that.

You want to feel good about yourself – I get it. Who the hell doesn’t want that? But (and here comes the shocker) did you know you can legitimately feel good about yourself just by owning the body and the personality you were born with??

I know that may sound crazy (especially if you’re under 20), but if you read this post til the end, I’ll teach you 3 things you can start implementing in order to become comfortable in your own skin.

1) Physically remove the nonsense.

Yes I said “physically”. There is no way I’d sit here and tell you to start by mentally ignoring things and people that don’t serve you because that requires a lot of willpower. And let’s not kid ourselves, very few people in the world have that kind of willpower, and they are probably not reading this post.

So if you’re starting from square one like most of us are, please go ahead and start the implementing the following: unfollow, block, mute, unfriend, and delete. Do whatever it physically takes to cut out the things and people breaking-down your self-confidence.

Delete fake friends

With that will come the end of comparisons.

Keep in mind, unless you can magically become another person like some “Freaky Friday” shit, you have approximately 0 reasons to compare yourself to others. You would not compare apples to oranges so why in the hell would you compare your life to the life of another person?!?! The fact is, you don’t know what’s going on inside anyone’s head, anyone’s home, or anyone’s life. So please stop wishing you were people you don’t know anything about.

2) Realize that other people want what you have.

There are literally 7 billion people in this world. The chances that at least one of them wants hair like yours or a personality like yours or a nose like yours etc., is f***ing high! We all want what we don’t have. Well the tough news is, you only have what you have!

I think it is f***ing sick that there is nobody else in the world exactly like you. Even identical twins have differences in personality and behaviour!! BABE, you are LITERALLY 1 in 7 000 000 000 000! That in and of itself is a lovely freaking miracle!

Unique and lovely

Please understand that no matter how hard you try to not be you, your true self will always shine through. Always and forever, you will be lucky enough to be yourself, and that my friends is a beautiful thing.

3) If you want to succeed at anything (…and yes, I said anything) you HAVE TO work at it.

And, believe it or not, that includes being comfortable in your own skin! I know it may seem shocking that you have to practice such a thing. But being comfortable with yourself in a socialized world does not come naturally.

Have you ever realized that adults get embarrassed less often than kids and teenagers? That is because they’ve been being themselves for a longer time!

So the good news is, you’ll get there too. And you can get there quicker if you start to do little things every day that will make you feel confident. Start by doing your hair the way you want, then wearing the clothes you want, then working the job you want … then one day, a few years from now, you’ll wake up and realize you are absolutely full of happiness because you fully embraced the real you!

Decide right now how you are going to practice self-confidence over the next 7 days. Write down the way(s) in your calendar or agenda or on a random scrap of paper, then COMMIT to doing those things. 7 consecutive days is all you need to get the “confidence ball” rolling.

In conclusion, I need you to start being brave enough to feel vulnerable. Confidence can become a habit just like anything else can. It won’t happen overnight, and it will be hard as f***, but I swear the day you realize you love who you are, you’ll realize it was worth it.

As always, Happy Monday ❤✌

Love yourself

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*Disclaimer: I am not a medical or mental health professional. Any information and content on my website is not a substitute for professional, medical, or legal advice.

Self-development

How to Seriously Advance Any Career

Pressure

Societal, family, peer … I guarantee we’ve all felt it from one source or another.

As a “millenial“, I’d say one common pressure felt by a lot of Gen Ys and Zs is that university degrees allow you to achieve your dreams.

*insert eye roll*

For the record, I am not saying university is a bad place to be, especially if you need and / or want a particular degree (says the chick with 2 degrees herself). BUT, what I am saying is presenting university as the best place to be is misleading people whose wants lie elsewhere.

Alternatively, in the past year or so, I’ve noticed a huge push on social media for entrepreneurship.

Similar to the idea of attending university, entrepreneurship itself is not a bad thing (and I personally think it is a great alternative or complement to university based on the way the education system seems to be headed). BUT entrepreneurship should also not be presented as the best option for young people.

Let me provide some examples to better explain why.

Example 1) The other day I saw an Instagram post that said something like “most of us serve a life sentence in a 9-5 job.” … this person actually compared a life prison sentence to legitimate work. Seriously!? I can see what they might’ve meant but I think that comparison is both dramatic and unfair.

Example 2) The same night I saw a Facebook post where someone mentioned that “entrepreneurship is the most courageous thing to do on this planet”. Yes, that was the exact quote. The most courageous thing!? What about firefighters who often literally risk their physical wellbeing just by doing their job? Or those who go to the police after being raped? Or those who realize that they hurt someone in the past and need to apologize? Or neurosurgeons? Or people just trying to live in war torn countries!?!

Simply put, I do not recommend we push people in the wrong direction by telling them university is the best place to be, but it is equally as dangerous to push people into entrepreneurship. Instead, I think we should encourage people to be problem solvers and teach them how to grow within the career of their choosing.

If you want to promote entrepreneurship because you think it is amazing and we need more entrepreneurs in the world, go for it. I might actually agree with you. But to tell people that having a 9-5 job working for an employer is a bad decision!? Stop. And then to say entrepreneurship is the most courageous thing to do on the planet!?…..that is just wrong.

A 9-5 can provide you with benefits, a good wage, minimal stress compared to entrepreneurship, and work-life balance. That sounds freaking awesome to me. In fact, I lived that life for 3 years and I have no complaints about it.

Telling a mass number of people that working a 9-5 is like going to prison, is a very bad idea (if you ask me) and you’re probably not doing the world any favours. Imagine we lived in a world where we had more entrepreneurs than employees. How would any business survive? The entrepreneurs wouldn’t have anyone to work at their companies! The world needs journalists and sales associates and dental assistants just like it needs people like Jeff Bezos and Elon Musk. And people who choose to work as employees instead of employers are hopefully doing it because they want to and because they are capable of that style of work.

Instead of making entrepreneurship the end-all be-all, I think we should advertise creativity.

We should tell people, that no matter what their job is, they should read books and problem solve on a daily basis so that they can make their place of work (where ever that may be) operate more efficiently. That might mean inventing an electric car, proposing a new curriculum for primary school students, or having the courage to propose a new working style to your manager.

So before you hop on social media to bash or promote a certain lifestyle, please consider something the world may actually need more of: creativity, analytical thinking, courage, and logic.

Work hard, be smart, and remember what’s right for you might not be right for the person next to you.

As always, Happy Monday ❤✌

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